Looking back I am uncertain as to how my journey to the darkest of continents, Africa, came to be. I aren't fulfilling any life long dream, nor prior to leaving the terra firma of home, had I any real burning desires to explore to be extinguished. Maybe it is best described as an accumulation of events that have lead me to this place.

All I know is, my life needed to change and that fate has played a helping hand.

So, here I am, in the diverse country that is South Africa, spending a year in the life of a GVI within the smallest of South Africans National Parks, Bontebok.

This blog, written under the majestic Langeberg mountains, is intended to keep you folks at home abreast of all my adventures, together with creating a personal account of my thoughts, feelings and sometimes emotions throughout my journey.

The idea being that by the wonders of the worldwide web, my written words will be held for prosperity, so that maybe one day when I am grey, old and surrounded by Grandchildren, I can say 'hey, I was young and adventurous once', or likewise when I am grey, old and infirm, I can bore the hell out of my fellow residents in the old age home.

Lastly, my introduction would not be complete without a word of thanks or three, for all my achievements have been realised with the love, support and guidance of those closest to my heart.

To my family, thank you for being my guiding light and seeing me through the darkness. Mum, for being you and for always listening, Lesley, for being my constant, my voice of reason and to Gran for simply understanding. I love you all.

To my friends, that come in a colourful array of personalities. Thank you all for your continuing encouragement and never failing support. Danni, my Star, my Angel, without you, I do not know where I would be, and to Karen for being forever there. You all make my World shine.

Perhaps somewhat ironically, I would also like to thank those few, from which I thought I would never recover. For without you, I would never have strived for better, nor had the opportunity to grow and become stronger.

And finally, a word to the wise, if you, yourself, are teetering on the edge of change, whether it be riding off into the sunset or simply discovering a new interest, in the immortal words of Nike.........just do it!

You never know you might just surprise yourself!

You will have noticed........

I am way behind on my blog writing, I say with a roll of the eyes and a heavy tut tut! I have decided to write a few lines about what I have been up to and when, to keep you up to date and hopefully whet your appetites until I find the time to write the full, lengthy saga.

Think of it in a positive way........ basically I have no time for blog writing, which means the long and short of it........... I have a life :)

Sunday 12 July 2009 - Dolphins and cocktails in PE

Saturday 11 July 2009 - Rough riding the Baviaanskloof

Short way across

Thursday 9 July - Start of the epic bike trip

Wednesday 8 July 2009 - Tearful goodbye

Tuesday 7 July 2009 - Mountain trail

Monday 6 July 2009 - Whale watching at De Hoop

Saturday 4 July 2009 - Visit from my ickle sister

Friday 3 July 2009 - Experiencing the transportation scheme in CT! Hold onto your bags ladies!

Till Thursday 2 July 2009 - I have waited over six months to see one! My first sighting of...............

Monday 29 June 2009 - BIG 50

Till Sunday 21 June 2009 - Walk in the Mountains

In one ear and out the other!

Tuesday 16 June 2009 - Today is a public holiday here in South Africa, Youth Day, a day to mark the next generation of the rainbow nation. Unlike our bank holidays at home, where we trapes around the likes of B&Q and IKEA, trying to avoid the inevitable miserable weather, many South Africans take the opportunity to celebrate their culture and do something positive for their community and today is no different.

Slowly I drive into the Township, following the last few paces of the Youth Day procession which marched through Swellendam earlier, making a start to todays events. I have arranged to meet with Aldo here, to show our faces and thus our support.

Parking up, I make my way to the Rugby field where the throng of people seem to be congregating. There is a good turn out considering the weather, we are now in the throws of a South African winter, which by all accounts is fairly mild but today is what my Mother would describe as 'dreek' - grey filled sky with light precipitation.

Feeling a little of a spare fart at a party, I scan the group in search for Aldo. Errrr no joy, OK try and look inconspicuous. Again a little hard as only white woman in a sea of colour. Thankfully I am befriended by a little English speaking chap from the local hotel, but as soon as a conversation is struck he has to leave for the start of his shift. Still no Aldo to be found, and no answer from cell.

Meanwhile the proceedings started, with soft drinks and a bakkie load of oranges being distributed amongst the children, whom huddle around the dustbins peeling and sucking at their dose of Vitamin C. Had oranges been picked to supply a small country or had a larger number of attendees been expected, I don't know, but either way there was a massive surplus of oranges. With delight, the children made the most of opportunity, oranges were collected by the armful, outer garments removed and packed, even trousers, the owner still in them, were bulging with the fruits until the very last orange was gone.

Moving onto the community hall, everyone is packed into the rows of seats already assembled for presentations from speakers on the dangers of drugs. Like a troublesome teenage, I position myself right at the back of the room listening to the excitable debate in 'Afrikaans', praying I would not be asked to participate. Seated, I become aware of a figure stood over me, looking to my left I see a traditional elderly coloured woman, weathered skin, her clothes worn, an ununiformed mix of colour and pattern. Being the good citizen that I am, I stand up and insist in over exaggerated signs that she should sit. Reluctantly she sits, patting my arm with gratitude, and then promptly orders some of the youths congregating the back to find me a chair.

Nearly two hours of debates in a foreign language ensued, concluded by each attendee been given a dish of pasta and meat served in a small polystyrene pot.

Finishing my food, I take the empty container, and that of my newly found friend (we are now trying to communicate with her English at zero and my broken Afrikaans, extremely limited) and move to the front to the existing pile of empties, weaving through the children which are now racing around the hall, the chairs stacked to the sides. I feel a tug at my shirt and turn to find a small distraught boy, tears flowing, he dramatically covers his face with one arm and points the other to a group of larger boys. One of the boys is hitting the others with a rolled newsletter which has been distributed earlier.

Have they been hitting him with the offending newsletter or stolen his copy, it was difficult to deduce. I take his hand, dispose of my empties on the table in front of me and lift him onto my hip, returning to the back of the room. There I find another copy of the newsletter, I give it to my new companion, who peruses it as if it were the morning newspaper, gently I settle him down on the floor and he is off........ seemingly quite happy. I turn to find myself in an emotional embrace with the elderly lady, her jesturing and excitably speaking in Afrikaans between hugs, and then she is gone.

Telling the tale to Ben at Marloth later that day, the events, although in a sense are trivial and circumstantial, leave me feeling a little warm and fuzzy, and although obviously disappointed to be left in the lurch by Aldo, I am also grateful for his absence for it lead me to experience so much more.

Dear John........

Monday 18 June 2009 - With my neatly written letter positioned on an obvious part of Aldos desk the previous night, I gingerly walk into the office this morning.

To my relief it has been graciously received and Aldo plans for us to go on one of our team building game drives. Navigating the eastern drive, we are able to discuss and resolve the whole situation agreeing to communicate more openly. Updates concerning ongoing projects are swapped and plans are made to move forward with the People & Conservation Department.

Phewweeeee!!!

Show me a garden that is bursting into life....

Till Sunday 14 June 2009 - Returning back to the park after a week away it is amazing to see the change in the veld, the aloe ferox are now flowering, tall impressive burnt orange spikes looking dramatic against the blue sky.

There is no transportation heading into town so the weekend is pretty uneventful, I simply enjoy being 'home' in the park and use the time to update the blog, catch up on the washing and dabble with my sketch pad and pastels.

Oh and I have made a plan, in the shape of a handwritten letter, not ideal and maybe even bordering on cowardly, but will help me get things off my ample bosom and hopefully improve the current atmosphere, me hopes.

Bodging.... bet you didn't know it was an art!

Till Friday 12 June 2009 - Holiday over, it is back to work bright and early Monday morning, and I soon find myself back in the thick of it. Our project 'Clean up and Create' for World Environment Week, the previous week, has been a huge success and I am congratulated by Aldo for managing to raise over R1,500 in sponsorship, particularly as many of the sponsors had not given us donations before. It must be the Yorkshire charm!

Amongst a lot of administration, including thank you letters, articles for the local rag, minute writing and KIP orders, it seems to be meeting after meeting this week, the first of which is for the SPAF Tourism and LED (Local Economic Development) workgroup. The meeting has been arranged to liaise with the newly formed STO Swellendam Tourism Organisation and invite them to view the delights of Suurbraak.

Held in Suurbraaks Paradise Organic Restaurant, a long airy table overlooking their gardens and the mountains is laid out with scented rose centre pieces, the meeting is opened, and soon turns quite heated, through miscommunication the STO is ill prepared for the meetings content and is also perturbed by the use of the word 'Tourism' within the SPAF workgroups title. Not the best start to building a lasting relationship between SPAF and the STO, the meeting is swiftly closed and we move on to the attributes of the village.

Suurbraak, a quaint village situated 19km east of Swellendam, was known by ancient San as 'Xairu' meaning beautiful or paradise. One of the villages charms is its isolation, being situated off the Wine Route R62 and busy N2, but this is not without its pitfall as this limits the financial resources for its residents. For this reason there are many people working hard to put Suurbraak on the map, hoping to make Xairu a place to stay and enjoy the sights, rather than a passing place. Found at the foot of the Langeberg Mountains, the village has a lot to offer the discerning traveller, including newly constructed trail walks, rustic and Dutch Cape architecture, ancient burial grounds, together with the production of some traditional crafts which can be visited.

This takes the group to the Suurbraak Carpentry Co-op which employs local people to use the old fashioned method of bodging to create beautiful handcrafted chairs. Demand is high for these chairs and distributed throughout South Africa and also shipped internationally.

My next meeting is the following day and is a brainstorming session to assist Bontebok Recycling, a business which recently burnt down in fire at the Municipality refuse dump. And still they keep coming, this time on Friday for preparations of Arbor Week and choice of indigenous trees to be planted in and around Swellendam.

Thankfully there is some reprieve, coming in the form of Game Count. Wednesday and Thursday morning is therefore spent driving around the veld at a snails pace (Oom Arvy at the wheel) me again employed as paparazzi recording the event, whilst the Rangers have a more hands on approach counting the Parks wild inhabitants from their vantage point - the back of the bakkie.

So too, Ben pulls out all the stops on Wednesday evening with a sun downer at the Wolfkloof Hiking Hut, after a short walk, we sit on the veranda sipping champagne overlooking the mountains as the sun slowly sets into the landscapes stillness. I could get use to this............

And as if I hadn't been treated enough we head to the Woodpecker for pizza and fabulous chocolate dessert.

Sadly, as the working week draws to a close, I fear I have caused some tension within the P&C Office. On occasions I do struggle with some of South Africas work ethics, and at the moment there seems to be a distinct lack of communication between myself and my supervisor. It is getting me down, yet I fear I cannot broach the subject without becoming emotional.......... I will have to make a plan.

Chicken run

Till Sunday 7 June 2009 - I feel a little out of touch as we stop in Alldays for petrol and an extortionately priced pee! Either poultry culling is high on the agenda for today or our feathered friend has become the new must have clutch bag, I think I seriously need to flick through the pages of HEAT! Every second local is carrying a chicken under their arm, baie bizarre, but baie stylish!

Our journey takes us back towards civilisation to the bright lights of Jo'burg. After refuelling again at Kranskop, tank full and our stomachs too with warm chocolate muffins from Wimpy, we are soon at our first destination, Pretorias' Menlyn Mall. The mall is a far cry from anything I am now use to, it is a shoppers paradise and is huge by even English standards, and surprisingly the last place I want to be. It is mega busy and I have no desire to look at clothes or shoes, maybe I'll give the HEAT magazine a miss after all.

Sandra treats us to lunch at Ocean Basket, South Africas Feesh franchise before we rendevous with Kevin and his son, and say our goodbyes to Kirsteen. Our Scottish friend has a holiday booked to visit Kruger again in just over a week, so rather than heading back to the red dunes of the Kalahari has arranged to work at SANParks Head Office Groenkloof instead - Kevin won't know what has hit him!

It is then time for myself and Bridgett to be dropped off at Jo'burg airport ready for our flight back to the Mother City. Our farewell with Sandra is all the more difficult as we have learnt during our trip that she has now resigned from her GVI position, instead of attending our next little GVI jaunt at the end of the year, she will be returning home 'down under' within the next few months.

Arriving back in Cape Town, we are met by the trusty Ben, ready to give us GVIs a lift back to Swellendam. Heading out to the car with our luggage, we find our carriage awaits in the form of the CapeNature little red VW, oops Ben isn't supposed to use this vehicle for personal use. He explains that the car hire dodgy dealer in Railton let him down at the last minute, he had no choice and will have to explain to management on Monday....... double oops.

On Sunday, with Sky (Bens canine) skulking around unsure of the new addition or maybe just the presence of an American, Bridgett is collected from Marloth by boyfriend Gerrard, leaving Ben and I to relax and enjoy a couple more episodes of the Long Way Down, you just can't beat a bit of Ewan McGregor.

Golden Rhino

Friday 5 June 2009 - Our final day begins with a tour of Mapungubwe Hill, World Heritage Site. We head out into parched landscape, the burnt ochre rock formations creating a stark contrast to the beautiful azure skyline. In our open vehicle, our guide Ali and armed ranger John point out Kudu and Klipspringer, their eyes accustomed to seeing any movement within their surroundings, as I squint into the distance, sometimes struggling to see what they are pointing out.

Arriving at our destination we take a short walk, passing trees ladened with hanging Weavers nests, Ali and John direct us to a large green metal plate on the ground. By ingenious design, with very little effort, the plate is rolled on its runners to one side, to reveal stairs descending into an underground dig site. The rock cut vertically to reveal layer upon layer of deposits, soil and bones, time lines dating back thousands of years.

Mapungubwe Hill is referred to as Sacred Hill of the Jackal and dates back to around 1220 AD and was home to a advanced culture of people, the ancestors of the Shona people of Zimbabwe. The area thrived trading in gold, ivory and other commodites with cultures such as Africa, Persia, Egypt, India and China until 1300 AD. The site was discovered in 1932 and has been excavated by the University of Pretoria ever since, producing some amazing finds including the famous gold foiled Rhinoceros. Sadly the site and its findings were kept quiet at the time since they provided contrary evidence to the racist ideology of black inferiority underpinning apartheid and only made public in 1994.

After visiting the dig site, we climb a couple hundred rickety wooden stairs built in the side of Mapungubwe Hill, ascending to the hilltop and its graveyard. Twenty-three graves have been excavated from this hilltop site. The bodies in three of these graves were buried in the upright seated position associated with royalty, with a variety of gold and copper items, exotic glass beads, and other prestigious objects. The hilltop also shows other evidence of habitation, patterned indentations on a level area of sandstone rock providing the board for a game of Maruba.

We make our descent back to the game vehicle, but not before enjoying the panoramic views from the hilltop. After lunch back at our accommodation, we take some time to relax before heading out again to the Tree Top Hide found on the edge of the beautiful Limpopo river. The board walk built high amongst the trees, making a leafy walk way to the hide and its stunning views. We spend some time identifying a variety of birds and spot a baby crocodile through the binos basking on the sand bank, before heading to the Confluence Sunset Deck for sundowners. The deck is situated to enable us to watch the sun go down over the land of three countries South Africa, Botswana and Zimbabwe, the view is spectacular, vast in proportion. Drinking warm Hunters, we watch the locals fish in the river, returning home to their huts with filled water containers expertly balanced on the heads of the women.

With the sun finally set, we head back for a braai on our sandy patio, our final night together before heading back to civilisation early in the morning.

Diamonds and fur........

Thursday 4 June 2009 - They say the early bird catches the worm, so we are up and out by 06h00, on the road heading to Maloutswa Bird Hide. After a quick detour, well what can I say, no fault of Sandras, the place wasn't very well signposted or how could all four of us have missed it.

The empty hide is situated next to a serene waterhole, the area is a hive of activity yet is somehow calming and tranquil. Through the trees we watch the birds flit and the animals arrive for a cool drink in dappled shade. We see baboons, impala, warthogs and mongoose. One lone impala ram is sporting a rather nasty broken leg, yet bravely negotiates the muddy banks to reach a well deserved drink. Despite his injury, he is in pretty good nick, which make us think his injury must have occurred recently. Although currently in good condition, we fear his days are numbered, easy picking for a predator in his weakened state.

Having had the hide to ourselves, we are not best pleased to be joined by a small family which incidentally is sporting not one but two cameras of epic proportion, feeling a tad inferior, we decide to head back to base before serious lens envy sets in.

Back at Sandras, it is time for breakfast and we take advantage of the sunny patio as we complete our feedback session.

In the afternoon, we head out of the Park to another GVI project Venetia, a private game reserve owned by De Beers, who are better known for their diamonds than work in conservation. After being shown around base camp, we head out to check on the boma containing wild dogs which are awaiting release, then out onto reserve in search of a collared lions. Picking up a good signal, we try to annihilate a few bushes with some serious off roading through dense mopane, hell you have to keep your wits about you too, in an open vehicle one of these branches could seriously take your eye out! Finally we find the handsome Blade lazing in the sun surrounded by his harem of lionesses. Sitting there for some time, watching a flick of a tail, a yawn maybe......... This certainly beats being at home in front of the telly watching Coronation Street!

As the light fades, the warming sun disappearing, the open vehicle suddenly loses its appeal as it becomes seriously cold, and colder still as we dip down hill and hit pockets of cold air. Lucky I have a slight distraction, armed with a strong portable spotlight I scan the darkness for eyes. I find a herd of impala, black backed jackal and a couple of scrub hares. I am vigilant looking for elephant for I am under strict instructions, to turn off the light quick quick as they do not like the brightness and have a tendency to charge (no pressure then!!). Finally back at base, after saying our farewells, I am happy to jump back in the Quantum to thaw out.

Baobab country!

Wednesday 3 June 2009 - This mornings game drive doubles up as our departure from Markele. Having said our farewells to Kevin at the gate, we continue north through the Limpopo Province to Mapungubwe after first making another stop at Thabazimbi to stock up on vital provisions, namely chocolate and alcohol (well we are on holiday!) and of course more substantial kos for the next few days.

Driving several hours we arrive at Mapungubwe National Park, which lies on the Botswana and Zimbabwe border and therefore possibly the most northerly point within South Africa. Whilst Sandra sorts out the keys with Reception, I am intrigued by a small scoop in the soil from which a stick is protruding. I get out of the Quantum to investigate to find there are several of them at staggered intervals along the entrance road. On closer inspection some of the sticks are flowering, delicate white flowers with a reddish throat which seeps to the petal edges. They are Impala lilies, it is hard to believe that such beauty can be produced from what is effectively a twig!

Heading to our accommodation, I am in awe of the rugged landscape. Large formations, burnt orange in colour, having suffered years of erosion create deformed stacks of rock, their crevices forming a natural habitat for the stark white roots of the wild fig, which twist and grow in complete contrast. The area is also peppered with the dramatic baobab trees, their menacing presence being the stuff childrens nightmares are made of. Yet, this tree has a magical, mystical aura which simply takes your breathe away as the sun slowly sets into the horizon behind the imposing silhouette of the majestic Baobab.

Arriving at Leokwe Camp, Kevin has done us proud yet again, three top notch thatched cottages built in the traditional Venda styley. Kirsteen and I decide to share, generously giving Bridgett and Sandra a cottage to themselves, although our generosity is not without ulterior motive, as it gives the opportunity for a proper 'skinder' and catch up. Our cottage is beautiful with all mod cons, air conditioning, private patio with braai facilities and a spectacular view. We are also completely spoilt with a luxurious outside shower, which I take full of advantage of after dinner and sun downers. Can there be anything more liberating than washing your cares away under a star filled sky? Me thinks not!

Monkey business

Tuesday 2 June 2009 - In true GVI style we start the day with a game drive. Marakele National Park is split into two areas, one side being home to the bokkies, the other being the place to find the predators. Unfortunately we don't see any of the latter, but we do happen across a kaleidoscope of giraffes, two of which are participating in a spot of necking. This affectionate dance, sees each giraffe bobbing their heads and twisting their necks around one another and is truly a sight to be seen.

The rest of the morning is spent with presentation from each Intern on their last six months working at their individual Parks. Although interesting, some are longer than others and two hours later, it is a bit of a relief when they are over.

Whilst making lunch we have a visitor from a rather cheeky primate. Failing miserably to thieve any of our provisions, he makes a hasty retreat to the roof of our accommodation after being shooed off. Although all is not lost as he has managed to cover our tea bags in monkey spittle! Hell, I am glad I don't drink the stuff!

Marakele Kids in Parks is in full swing, so after lunch we travel through the Park to meet with People & Conservation Officer, Happy - yes that's his name, and children, to see how their programme is running. Bridgett and I are thrilled to find an old face - the KIP bus driver is none other than our very own Bassier and take the opportunity to catch up with him.

Sandra, driver extraordinaire, does a sterling job of driving the hefty Quantum up into the hills for a sun downer with the Cape Vultures. Scrambling over the rocky surface in flip flops, we finally find a perch near to the cliff edge. Drinking in the wonderful landscape, together with warm Hunters Dry, we sit watching the scavengers circle round and round on the thermals.

Back home in the Western Cape, Ben is heading to CT to support two of his children in the final of the Battle of the Bands. They are placed in the top four out of all the bands competing in this South African competition, so not bad going!

What a difference a year makes..........

Monday 1 June 2009 - Bright and early, we set off to Cape Town airport, in fact there is nothing bright about it, it's the middle of the night.

Arriving in good time, we check the board, our flight not registered, Bridgett and I chat. Keeping on eye on the flight board, we decide to grab a spot of breakfast. Time is pressing, still no news on our flight half an hour before it is due to take off, we head to check in our luggage.

Advising the stern looking rep of our flight time, with a flick of the waist to view her watch, we are informed 'Madam, your flight closed five minutes ago'. You're kidding me, right!?! My heart starts to palpitate, I explain that we have been here for over an hour and there was nothing on the flight board. Apparently this is Africa, and it doesn't work like that, we check in, then wait for the flight to show to board!

It must be our innocent faces, or me pleading foreign ignorance, but the kind lady delves deep and takes pity on us reopening check in. Whilst our passports are being examined, a grinning luggage attendant cheekily asks us if we slept in!

Flying into Jo'burg, meeting up Sandra and finally Kirsteen, I feel a real sense of deja vu. Once again jumping in the GVI Quantum, we hit the busy road of Johannesburg, driving several hours mistakenly the long way round, we make a stop at Thabazimbi, the only real civilisation before Marakele National Park, for essential chocolate and Hunter Drys, and the all important lemon to go with.

Arriving at Marakele, the three GVIs, myself, Bridgett and Kirsteen make ourselves at home in our tented accommodation, Heron. The camp is nestled along the beautiful river bed, where Waterbuck grazing shadowed by the rocky hills scape of Marakele.

Settled in, make our way to our neighbours for braai a la Kevin, the menu consisting of half a cow each and skilpadjie. Kevin, his usual mischievous self, shows us the unprepared food, tells a convincing tale that we are about to consume tortoise. Disbelieving, Bridgett and I rake through the dustbin searching for concrete evidence, find wrapping marked skilpadjie, holy kak, he really is cooking tortoise! Only then is the cat let out of the bag, the round tortoise sized aptly named portions, are in fact liver encased in sausage skin. Hell I think I'd find the tortoise more palatable!

In the township

Till Sunday 31 May 2009 - Feeling a little tired from events the previous evening, we make the three hour journey back to Swellendam in time for me to make my 'cake date' at Old Gaol with Bulelwa for some girlie 'skindering'.

In the afternoon I am asked to take Edward into the township, to pick up one of the works bakkies from Oom Arvys'. This is a place that needs to be experienced, it is difficult to find the words to describe this community, nothing in England comes close to find a comparsion, so I will try my best to paint a picture for you.

The labyrinth of Rainton is made up of small symmetrical brick built houses, usually consisting of just two rooms, each one finding its own unique identity and place on the colour spectrum in the rows of uniformity. The tar roads dissolve into dirt tracks, and the streets are always a hub of activity, lined with people come rain or shine, day or night. The streets, where dogs roam freely, where children seemingly without a care in the World will be found playing on the street, where fires can burn into the night.

Driving through Rainton for me is always an experience, leaving the township I am always thankfully to be leaving without incident. I fear not for my safety for I have always felt safe within this friendly community, my fear is that one of these days, a small child or animal will run out in front of me and I won't be able to stop in time.

Believe it or not, next week is the six monthly GVI trip away, so Bridgett arrives in Swellendam to enable us to travel together to Jo'burg. An early start is anticipated to catch our flight from CT, Ben is kindly transporting us so we spend the night at Marloth. Snuggled under duvets in front of the open fire in the lounge, I pray Bridgett doesn't confuse me for boyfriend Gerrard in the middle of the night.

Going back to my roots

Friday 29 May 2009 - Today's plan were suppose to be quite simple, a leisurely day in Hermanus, the town known for its whale viewing during the months of August and September, but the plan keeps evolving.

Setting off early I join Ben, who is travelling to CapeNature Regional Office to interview for a post at De Hoop. Arriving in Hermanus, we have time for a spot of breakfast and to pop into see Bens Sister Margaret and husband, who run an art gallery in the centre of the town, before I am left to my own devices.

Hermanus, is a pretty coastal town, there are the usual suspects on the High Street, Clicks (like Boots), Musica (HMV), Mr Price (cheap, cheap version of New Look), Pick n Pay (Asda), but I head for the gifty shops I have spotted on the drive in. There is an interior design shop, where I could really go to town and then one where all the items on sale are made in South Africa. With my ickle Sisters birthday in mind, I buy her a little something, although once boxed posting could become a problem........ OK never mind I will cross that bridge when I come to it.

Time flies, the next thing I know I receive a call to say my ride is here! Hell, I wanted to continue with the retail therapy.

So the original plan being, after my little trip to Hermanus I would naturally to return home to the Park. But oh no, Ben has other ideas volunteering to take Martin, the interviewee, back to the airport in Cape Town, he has managed to pursue Jane and Chris (the Protea expects) to put us for the night so we can all go 'jolling'. OK, so who am I to be a party pooper, Martin and I squeeze into the passenger seat and we are off to the Mother City.

After dropping Martin off, we negotiate rush hour and head to an upmarket area of CT, where Jane and Chris are renting 'The Dog House' aptly named, because it literally is the size of a dog box. The narrow building is a granny annex off the main house, there is one bedroom, the passage to the bedroom doubles as the shower room and the kitchen space can be found in a cupboard in the lounge, the two ringed hotplate pulls out and is quite in genius really. The place is quaint and suits J & Cs needs, they have been living in South Africa for a few months and are returning to the States next week.

Venturing out, we hit 'The Fat Cactus' for dinner and frozen margheritas. The place is packed, and has a great atmosphere. Unfortunately they are fully booked inside, so we are forced to eat outside, we are supplied with authentic ponchos and luckily the outdoor heaters are working a treat. After dinner, we head to The Observatory, an area of CT, well known for its nightlife and live music. We plump for a bar called 'Roots', enjoying a couple of Savannahs and a spot of people watching near the open fire. Later into the night, the stage is filled with two guitarists, one also being the vocalist, a dread locked Australian no less, giving the place a reggae vibe.

Put up on sofa beds (please note the plural), Ben and I camp out in the lounge and are woken by Bens cell at some ridiculous hour. It is the Swellendam Fire Department, does he have a number for someone at the Park. The Municipality dump is ablaze, with strong winds it heading for the Park. Hell - fire! We work together and call Bulelwa and SMS Ruhan who is in the Park alone. After we have woken all and sundry, it is determined that the Park is not on fire, the Fire Inspector has been over zealous.

I have to laugh, for if Ben and I were having a torrid affair, we would have been well and truly sprung. Although all is quite innocent, I'm not looking forward to the Bontebok interrogation come Monday morning!

Love what you have done to the place

Till Thursday 28 May 2009 - By the end of Monday I am feeling really cheesed off, in fact my diary entry is a little stronger than that. I feel I have been stuck in the office for days now, I'm going stir crazy! Tuesday I have had enough and definitely ready to throw my teddy out of the cot, so I grab some bakkie keys and head for the Aloe Hill trail to collect old aloe seeds for a display I am designing at Reception.

Tuesday evening brings a welcome change from dinner for one in the Park, Ben has more Protea specialists staying with in the shape of Jane and Chris, accompanied this time by their boss, Kent, and fellow colleague Bronwyn, who remains quiet for most of the evening, yet has us all in stitches when she asks deadpan, 'Ben have you decorated the house yourself or used an interior designer?'. Let me explain, Bens place is..... err what you would say an acquired taste, an unusual choice of colours, add an eclectic mix of furniture and assorted nik naks, then you are about there. LivingEtc it ain't!

Bontebok staff join forces with CapeNature on Wednesday evening to distribute informative Baboon leaflets to Swellendam residents affected by these somewhat troublesome primates. The issue being the town is encroaching into the baboons habitat. We believe a minority of residents have been feeding the baboons, this attracting the baboons into people gardens and quickly making them fearless of human presence and quite intimidating. Feedback is generally positive, although Phiebe heatedly explains that when the residents see baboons, they see black people. The conflict between baboons and humans becoming a race issue...... seriously who would have thought it?!? As we are in town, Bulelwa, Phiebe and myself take the opportunity to dine out at Mattsens.

The rest of the working week is taken up with preparation for World Environment Week, racing around town trying to generate sponsorship and prizes, I feel I am meeting myself coming backwards.

On the most part I find people welcoming and quite generous, considering I am new to the area and English speaking. Although I am disappointed by a couple of local firms that will remain nameless, I have approached companies that are either suppliers for the Park or that I have personally used. I get a bee in my bonnet about not using the firms that aren't prepared to support us, at this rate there will be nowhere for me to eat out. Ummm I think I might have to reconsider!

Best foot forward

There is an advert being run by ABSA, one of the South African banks at the moment.

It is wonderfully done with shots of feet, hence the title, participating in various activities. But it is the words that really inspire me, so I thought I would share it at the beginning of my blog.

Sunday best

Till Sunday 24 May 2009 - After plenty of organisation and far too much hand holding for my liking, the P & C Department takes the prospective Bontebok Honorary Rangers to Bosheuwel, SANParks educational centre near L'Agulhas to join the Overberg HR monthly meeting. This months together being a working meeting, a continuation from yesterdays Biodiversity Day, where the HRs are assisting with bird and game counts in Agulhas National Park.

Leaving early from Bontebok National Park, the Park is covered with thick fog, the usual mountainous landscape has completely disappeared making the area seem flat and uninteresting. As I drive out of the Park, there are comments made from the back of the Quantum, 'Aldo, re the lights on?', initially not understanding what is being said Aldo and I are a little confused! Then I realise, are the vehicle lights on! Bloody cheek, 'Ashtray and door handle' I retort.

With a short 'essential' stop at SPAR in Bredasdorp for the unprepared members amongst us requiring items for the bring and braai, we arrive ten minutes later than scheduled to gibes of being late! Smile sweetly and count to ten, Tracy!

Eventually, we divide into small groups, armed with clipboard, countsheet, GPS and binos, I take one group in the Quantum to the saltpan. With frailer members of the HRs on board, I negotiate around the Fynbos down a narrow track to get to the area in which we are to start the count. To my dismay, I hear a long scraping sound along the side of brand spanking new vehicle! OMG! And there it is, a scratch from the nose to tip. OMG! Frantically I polish with my jumper sleeve (SANParks uniform, so no worries there) and to my relief whatever it is rubs off!

The days activities finish with a bring and braai, allowing us to socialise with the Overberg HRs, and me time to catch up with Bridgett and Gerard, who have brought me the promised SA delight Peppermint Fridge Tart.

Now, how to get the drunken members of our group back to Swellendam in time for the tail end of the rugby?!?

Sunday, and Ben has some making up to do! After miscommunication during the week, he stood me up, and I am taking the opportunity to 'pull his chain' about it. So we head off on the bike for breakfast in Barrydale, taking an alternative off road route. we have set off a little later than usual, due to the mist, so as we travel through Suurbraak, the villagers togged up in their vibrant Sunday best are ambling their way to church, an old guy sits on a wall watching the world go by, wearing his suit and pink trilby.

The 'alternative' route, as usual finds me gazing in awe at South Africas beautiful countryside, smattered with shacks and small holdings, with the occasional quaint Cape Dutch cottage white washed with thatched roof. Birds soaring beneath me, as I look down into the valley.

The track turns rocky with deep rutts, and I wonder if we will make it to the top. We have by now been on the bike a couple of hours, and I am beginning to feel a little numb. Twenty minutes and we will be there, I am told. One hour later, I breath a sigh of relief as I see Barrydale in the distance. Needless to say after three hours on the bike, John Wayne swagger ensued!

Twickle, twickle little star

Till Friday 22 May 2009 - A stressful start to the week is expected with the dreaded visit to the Home Affairs office in Paarl to extend my visa. After triple checking my paperwork, we set off early, making a quick detour in Worcester to the Medicentre to pick up my chest X-ray and radiological report. My experience of organisation in South Africa being near non existent, my heart is in my mouth as I enter through the glass doors, what if the report aren't here, what if they haven't been completed, and more importantly what if I have tuberculosis??? With far too much ease, the nurse asks my name and pulls out my reports, easy peasy, I see trouble ahead!

With documents clutched to my chest, I enter the Home Affairs office, which is a hive of activity with a long line standing for the information desk and then a great number of people waiting in uncomfortable plastic chairs. I join the line for the information desk and told to stand at the immigration desk.

There are two men behind the counter dealing with enquiries, one stern, fairly mean looking, the other appearing quite laid back. I start to pray and will the person in front to finish quick quick, so I will get the laid back one! But no, I have to get the stern one, I start to explain why I am here, as he demands to look at my paperwork. One by one he scrutinises each document I put in front of him, the application form I have completed is the wrong one, the letter provided by GVI doesn't confirm the exact minute (OK slight exaggeration - date) that I finish my internship, my Criminal Records Bureau check is a photocopy and not the original, I may have written it myself, and the peace de la resistance I need to pay a R9,000 deposit (approximately 700 pounds).

Although I can feel my heart rate increasing, racing out of my chest, I find calmness from somewhere and quickly complete the correct form, arrange for Bulelwa to fax a letter from the Park confirming my leaving date, and stand my ground as I explain to Jerry (we are on first name terms by this point) that the original CRB check is with their South African Embassy in London and that R9,000 is to be paid if I did not have the funds to buy a return air ticket, and as I clearly had proof of a return flight I would not be paying the deposit.

By this time, Jerry has started to mellow, asking where I'm from, do I have children, do I like soccer, that he wants to me to be in the country for 2010 and the World Cup. That he wants me to be illegal, so he can arrest me (what?!?) I take the opportunity to flirt a little, hell anything to get my visa, well almost anything! After asking several times, Jerry assures me my application is good - I must call him in a couple of weeks to check my visa has been approved. So then I am on my merry way, but not before trying to comfort another English lady behind me starting the same ordeal, she is visibly shaking.

Outside the office, Ben has kindly arranged for his sister, Ellen, who lives in Paarl, to pick me up and take me to the local shopping mall for a spot of retail therapy, whilst he finishes his meeting in Cape Town and collects me on the way home. Seriously travelling anywhere in South Africa can be a logistical nightmare.

The next couple of days are spent distributing letters to the schools participating in World Environment Week and to local firms requesting prizes for the event, writing articles about the visit to Table Mountain, together with the organisation of the next quarterly SPAF meeting, can you believe three months have passed already!

Thursday night, a welcome reprieve from SPAF minutes, I am invited by Ben to join him for a sundowner at the Hermitage. Scrambling over the dry river bed, we find ourselves perched on a rock, next to a dark pool of tranquil water, shallow waterfalls trickling into it. The pool nestled deep in the kloof, its stillness and beauty magnified by the dense lush ferns surrounding its banks. It is simply breathtaking.

Ben produces a small picnic, a bottle of wine and two wine glasses each quirkily stored in a woollen sock for protection (gosh, I do hope they were clean!). So as the sun disappears, we eat and chat, the wine going down far too well.

Soon it is dark, on first glance there is not a star in the sky, but then as you see a tiny sparkle and the others miraculously appear one by one. It is a beautiful clear night, which could possibly have been the most romantic of my life, had it been shared with the one I love. Be it may, Ben and I are friends, and that is the way it will stay, although I have never known anyone make quite such an effort for me, which in a way makes me extremely sad. Why have I not experienced this before?

Had there been any romance, it would have quickly filtered into hysteria, for it is now pitch black and we need to negotiate the route back. Add to the mix the vino I have just drunk and the fact I am a light weight and therefore a bit tiddly and it is a recipe for disaster. Giggling all the way back, I lose my balance fall backwards scraping my elbow and bruising my rear. Hell, I haven't had a scabby elbow since I was about eight!

Friday - I hit the headlines in the Langeberg Bulletin (local rag) - no not with my antics from the night before, but articles written, one about the New Faces of Bontebok in which Aldo, Elton and myself are featured, and then the other in my fair hand on our World Environment Week project 'Clean up and Create'.

So long, farewell, Auf Weidersehen, goodbye

Till Sunday 17 May 2009 - It's raining, the weather suiting my mood. Asanda is leaving today and I am really going to struggle to say goodbye, I hide away in my office, writing my blog, a welcome distraction to pass the time. Gerta and family collect Asanda from the Park, taking her to the bus stop, and I somehow manage to say my farewells and hold it together.

The weekend finishes on a better note, having been enticed up to Marloth with the promise of the sole use of Bens computer, the warm glow of an open fire, and the deal clincher.......chocolate, no excuses for writers block this creating the ultimate scenario for blog posting. Ben finally prises me away from the keyboard to venture up the mountain, purely in the interest of my blog, you understand. His argument being you can't write a blog about blog writing, which is a fair point.

Travelling up to the trail, we make use of the CapeNature quad bike. Ben upfront until we are out of sight of the office, then we make a quick switch and it is my turn in the drivers seat. At the start my coordination with the throttle and gear changing is a little ropey to say the least, but soon I get the hang of it and we are zipping down the dirt track dodging the ditches. My laughter carrying through the pine forest, the wind on my face and running through my hair.

Once parked we hit the trail at a slow pace due its gradient. The path is steep and rocky, yet beautiful, enveloped in woodland and green ferns. We reach our destination and rest on rocks overlooking a serene waterfall, the pool beneath tranquil, its water a sinister black colour caused by tannins from the surrounding vegetation.

Heading back I am once again driving the quad bike until we are in close proximity of the office, never conventional Ben decides it would be a fabulous idea to park the bike in front of the garage with a near 360 spin! Screaming with fear and delight, it briefly takes me back to my teenage years, and skidding in the snow in the back of a renault van at Low Mowthorpe.

You're fired!

Till Friday 15 May 2009 - My blood is starting to boil, my frustrations with Home Affairs in the preparation of sorting my visa extension is rising to the surface. Having spent the best part of last week on the phone to them discussing their requirements, they now tell me I need an official form for my doctor and radiological reports. These forms cannot be downloaded from their website, nor can they possibly be emailed or faxed, they must be picked up in person from one of their offices. Hello, I have just spent three days in Cape Town, I am now one hour away from the nearest Home Affairs office!

With my doctors appointment, which has already been rearranged once, booked, I am not prepared to take NO for an answer, I call the biggest wig I can find and make a right royal fuss about the situation. Several calls later and a bit of name dropping, I have faxed copies of the forms in my grubby little mitts. I love it when a plan coming together!

Friday brings sunshine and showers. Aldo turns in sporting his new uniform, hilarious doesn't even cover it, and then there is Asandas' disciplinary, and as my title suggests, I think you will have guessed the outcome.

Unfortunately due to the lack of remorse shown, management had no choice but to dismiss Asanda. I fear that Asanda was so busy trying to hold it together, she wasn't able to show her true feeling within the meeting. The day finished being extremely upsetting, I will never forget holding Asanda, us each consoling the other, and the two dark patches of mascara left on my uniform where Asanda had buried her face. Equally I will not forget Aldos kindness, as we walk up to the view point allowing me time to breathe and take stock.

Driving Miss Daisy

Wednesday 13 May 2009 - An early start sees us leaving Duiker Cottage at 07h00, Jack has his Peace Officer examination at a shooting range in Cape Town at 09h30, we could get snarled up in rush hour traffic. We journey along the coast, the sun rising. Travelling through Mitchell's Plain, you can't help feeling a little on edge, the township being known as a bad area of Cape Town, the local community recently proclaiming the police were doing nothing turned vigilante, shooting known drug dealers. This somehow not assisting the areas notorious reputation.

The Bontebok Rangers, boy scouts in a former life they were not, as true to form we find ourselves lost in Bellville, no one knowing how to get to the shooting range, it's address or telephone number - fantastic! We stop at the nearby Police station to no avail, it is 09h30 the starting time of the examination! By some sheer good luck, we find it, having spent over two and half hours in the back of the bakkie with Eltons driving, I am by now feeling a little worse for wear. Nothing in moderation, the foot is either slamming on the brakes or floored on the accelerator, with all the Cape Town robots (traffic lights) it is no laughing matter.

Just as I think the day can't get any worse, we head to MAKRO, an oversized electrical store selling everything imaginable, preparation for Kids in Parks we need a proforma invoice and a quotation, but getting one member of staff that knows what they are talking about is another matter, then you have to go to each department separately, you turn around and where the hell is Aldo?? Arrggghhhh!

Mission finally completed after a few hours, I kid you not, it is back on the road to pick up Jack, who passed his exam with flying colours and commence the journey back home to Swellendam. The three hours is filled getting to know Jack and his culture a little better, as he tells me and Aldo about his family and the traditions.

One being that you must pay your in laws, when choosing a Wife. Latterly you have been able to pay in cold hard cash, but previously your Wifes hand in marriage was set by the number of cattle and sheep you could provide. Originally I thought the whole idea a little odd, lets face it girls, its hard enough these days finding a good man, let alone one that will marry you, and to pay for the privilege as well! But wait maybe they are on to something here, the man is surely showing he is the provider, hard as it seem, he is prepared to make the investment in you, putting his money where his mouth is, so to speak, so therefore does this show a greater commitment to being with the one he loves? Maybe? It's just a thought, serious though, what the hell do I know, men are from another planet :)

European Reunion

Tuesday 12 May 2009 - With sandwiches packed lovingly made by yours truly, the Rangers and People & Conservation Department go their separate ways today, each heading to different corners of Table Mountain National Park. Aldo and I have a slow start, still unsure whether anyone is available to see us from TMNP P&C.

Finally we get a lift to Westlake in Cape Town to meet Calvin Mojapelo TMNP P&C Manager, this giving us the ideal opportunity to pick his brains regarding the running of a large scale P&C department, during which we are introduced to Mark Hawthorne, one of TMNP three P&C Officers.

Meeting complete, Mark takes the occasion to show us a little of the Park, with Aldo up front and me in the back of the covered bakkie with three other international volunteers, two French and one German.

And so my first ascent up Table Mountain commences, travelling to The People's Trail Hut on a near vertical dirt track wide enough for one vehicle, a sheer drop at one side. OMG one false move at the wheel and we are goners!!! Sat on the metal floor of the bakkie, is not the most comfortable of experiences especially when travelling on bumps, I am therefore not best pleased when Aldo suggests a trip up Table Mountain cable car to Mark, with time pressing this means we have to travel down the mountain side in double time, oh dear my poor coccyx!

Avoiding certain death, we make it back to level ground, the luxury of tarmac and the slow grind of Cape Town rush hour. Despite the odds, we make it to the cable car in good time, only to find that it has broken down, the visitors that had made the trip earlier would be waiting around three hours to make their slow descent. Although a little disappointed, I know I will return to Cape Town some other time, a visit to South Africa surely cannot be complete without a trip up Table Mountains cable car, can it?

With the setting sun glistening in the ocean, we journey back making a slight detour to check out the facilities at the Sunbird Education Centre.

Arriving back at base just after 19h30, I find the Rangers have made a start on dinner, this is said with a hint of sarcasm! Their sole contribution for the three days being building a fire for the braai. Me man, me make fire ugh! Maybe I am doing them an injustice, for they did do the washing up and Elton cooked the meat, Jedi braaier that he is, whilst I thrashed Jack at a game pool! Sshhh don't tell anyone, lets preserve Jacks ego, not bad for a gal who hasn't played for over a decade, eh?!?

Pick up a Penguin!

Monday 11 May 2009 - Behind the wheel of the canopy bakkie, I drive Aldo (People & Conservation Officer) and Lungile aka Jack (Field Ranger) to Cape Town for staff exchange with Table Mountain National Park. Collecting another Bontebok staff member - Elton (Section Ranger) in Mandalay, a suburb of CT, we finally locate him despite dismal directions.

All aboard, we travel along the coastal road around False Bay and through Simonstown, towards the Cape of Good Hope, and our home for the next couple of days, Duiker Cottage situated within the National Park.

Due to some confusion within the TMNP P&C team, we are unable to meet with them today, so after unloading our gear and food provisions, we make use of the time and see what the Park has to offer.

Firstly visiting the penguins at Boulders Beach in Simonstown. Despite being warned on numerous occasions that the colony of birds is quite smelly, I was not deterred and pleasantly surprised finding them far from pungent. Wanting to visit Boulders Beach since the days of Judith Charmers and Wish you were here, I sat on the rocks and watched the penguins waddling around me, jumping in and out of the sea swells, or sleeping on land, many in dug out nests protecting their clutch of eggs.

Sadly leaving my monochrome friends, we head to one of the windiest places on the Planet, Cape Point. Braving strong gusts of wind whilst climbing the steps leading to the lighthouse. The view was simply breathtaking overlooking the rugged Cape Point and the Cape of Good Hope, jagged cliff face plunging into the blue depths of the Atlantic Ocean.

Sexy SANParks uniform or what!?! Yes, OK, OK - WHAT!

Childs play!

Till Sunday 10 May 2009 - Saturday requires a mammoth shop at SPAR ready for Mondays trip to Table Mountain National Park. The only problem is the banks in town are not playing nicely or should I say, not paying nicely, trying to withdraw cash from three different banks to no avail, surely I can't be insolvent already!?! Luckily Aldo is in town and able to give me a sub. With shopping list in hand, I cruise the aisles and complete the biggest shop since arriving in SA.

Sunday and I am back on the motorbike. With an inclement start to the day, mist rolling in from the mountains, I fully appreciate the delights of biking back in the UK, with condensation furring up my visor I barely see the rural landscape, a patchwork of cropped farmland and the isolated traditional homes as we meander off road through cold and damp to Montagu. Arriving at the restaurant come farm shop and nursery on Route 62, the sun is thankfully breaking through. After a hearty breakfast overlooking the drying riverbed, the child in me squeezes my derriere into a swing inventively made out of an old tyre, unfortunately not designed for use by full grown adults it lacked the apparent legroom needed to gain any momentum. Shame!

Back at Marloth, Bens' dog Sky discovers a puff adder in his domain, the reptile must have recently shed its skin, its beautiful colouring shimmering in the sun as it slithered a hasty retreat into the under growth, obviously perturbed about the production of one hooked stick and black plastic box.

The day was completed with a walk on the mountain, through pine tree plantation, reminiscent of times spent in Yorkshires Dalby Forest, but on a grander scale. The foliage slowly changing, the forest floor covered in dense mountainous fynbos, the ferns with fronds of new growth awaiting to uncurl. The dam nearby mirroring the mountain peaks in the slight ripple of its cool waters.

It's a small World..........

Till Friday 8 May 2009 - National Bird Week - with plans to erect two owl boxes in Suurbraak and encourage these predators to nest, the P&C department concentrate on a lesson plan to teach the local children the benefits of having owls inhabiting the area. With many old myths and superstitions surrounding these nocturnal birds, the owl being associated with death and bad luck in SA, it is important to reeducate these young minds.

Visiting three schools during the course of the week, I nervously give the owl lesson in Engels (English!) with a klein bietjie (tiny) amount of Afrikaans, asking questions throughout the lesson, I am met with glazed expressions from a room full of faces. Can they understand me? Finishing with a test on the subject matter, many of the kids receive top marks, I conclude that they can understand me perfectly well, they are just a little shy to answer in English. Completing the lesson for four classes in total, I educate 254 children over the week, the largest group being 110 children with the added pressure of Swellendam TV filming the proceeds, yet I still manage to get a couple of laughs out of the audience!

Asanda thankfully has the sense to speak to Bulelwa on Monday, and confess about the damage to the bakkie.

Thinking forward for our World Environment Week recycling project, Aldo and I visit Magpie in Barrydale on Wednesday. This art studio concentrates on lighting and recycling http://www.magpiehomefineware.mfbiz.com/ the firm produces the most amazing chandeliers and light fittings made from recyclables and is heavily involved within the community of Barrydale providing employment, obvious recycling facilities and HIV awareness, together with annually providing and decorating the village Christmas tree. On our return to Bontebok, we pop in to Jam Tart Cafe for tea and cake, the owner of which, recognising my accent, informs me she lived in Yorkshire (Leeds and South Milford!) for 15 years.

Friday brings ten more children to the Park for Plant Monitoring with Flora (see photo). Ben takes me for pizza and the most amazing chocolate pudding at the local deli coincidentally called 'Woodpecker'.

Do you wanna be in my gang?

Sunday 3 May - Those that knew me before I journeyed to the southern hemisphere would probably describe me as Miss Play it Safe.

They would be surprised, as I surprised myself, for today I donned on leathers, and jumped on not one, but two motorbikes. Well anything for pancakes!

After losing a good friend many years ago in a biking accident, I swore blind you’d never get me on one of those 'things', but maybe South Africa has unearthed the daredevil in me and as they say ‘never say never!’

Saying that I woke feeling far from daredevil like and actually praying for precipitation, the only way to postpone the day without losing face! The weather being inclement recently, it wasn’t a huge ask, but oh no, beautiful blue skies and the sun shining. A good a day to die as any, I suppose!

I heard the bike before I saw it, a huge hunk of metal. Against my better judgment, I leathered up and with crash helmet firmly in place, straddle the roaring machine, clinging on for dear life. What on earth was I thinking!

Travelling to Marloth to change from off roader to road bike, eyes firmly shut I see little of the landscape whizzing past. First leg of the journey over, dismounting, I find I am shaking, quite literally, my pins turning to jelly. Words of reassurement such as ‘You cannot fall off’ prove to be little comfort, particularly as the sentence is barely complete, and the bike crashes to the ground whilst maneuvering it back into the garage.

Not any less scary on the road bike, but I venture to keep my eyes open. Heading down the N2, I focus on the landscape, the open fields, the occasion herd of goats, some on hind legs munching the tree foliage, all shadowed by the magnificent Langeberg. Leaving the main road, we wind through Suurbraak, avoiding nomadic cattle and children playing in the street, then on the pass towards Barrydale, we meander through the dramatic scenery, lush green mountains cascading down into water filled ravines, all the while the sunshine causing pretty spectrums in my visor.

Arriving at our destination, The Country Pumpkin in Barrydale for breakfast, I cannot help myself. OK, I’ve admitted it already - I swore I’d never get on a motorbike, but that hasn’t stopped me harboring a secret fantasy of one day becoming a wanton biker chick, all legs and leather, casually removing my crash helmet, and shaking free waves of shimmering blonde locks which flow full of life momentary in the breeze, before tumbling down my back in Hollywood slow motion. Sadly such is life, reality barely touches the fantasy, gingerly removing the helmet without the loss of an ear, my golden mane lays lifeless, firmly stuck to my head, with the fullness and body equaling that of Mahatma Gandhi.

Thankfully the breakfast, started with a shot of some alcoholic complimentary for bikers, was worth all the drama and it is time to travel back, or so I think.

Heading the wrong direction for home, we ride into the arid landscape of the Little Karoo, in search of renowned biker haunt known as Ronnie’s Sex Shop. Situated midway between Barrydale and Ladismith, this place started life as Ronnie’s Shop, selling a few oddments to passing travellers, but after a raucous all nighter, some bright spark drunkenly took a ladder, paintbrush and red paint and made a small, but substantial addition to the signage. And who would have thought it, sex sells, even in the desert. Ronnie, the ZZ top look-alikey now owns one thriving business with Road Kill Café, small shop selling T-shirts and one infamous bar, where you can pin your business card to the wall and leave your bra hanging from the ceiling. The toilets are equally entertaining walls covered with graffiti from all corners of the globe. Not wanting to let the side down, I felt compelled to make my own addition.

Returning to the safety of Bontebok, much to my Mothers relief, no doubt, I know I will never be a biker chick, yet I have gained a valuable insight into the two wheeled feet of engineering, and can now understand the attraction held avidly by others.

For Jody, always remembered for your love and your laughter. You are missed, dear friend.