Driving Miss Daisy

Wednesday 13 May 2009 - An early start sees us leaving Duiker Cottage at 07h00, Jack has his Peace Officer examination at a shooting range in Cape Town at 09h30, we could get snarled up in rush hour traffic. We journey along the coast, the sun rising. Travelling through Mitchell's Plain, you can't help feeling a little on edge, the township being known as a bad area of Cape Town, the local community recently proclaiming the police were doing nothing turned vigilante, shooting known drug dealers. This somehow not assisting the areas notorious reputation.

The Bontebok Rangers, boy scouts in a former life they were not, as true to form we find ourselves lost in Bellville, no one knowing how to get to the shooting range, it's address or telephone number - fantastic! We stop at the nearby Police station to no avail, it is 09h30 the starting time of the examination! By some sheer good luck, we find it, having spent over two and half hours in the back of the bakkie with Eltons driving, I am by now feeling a little worse for wear. Nothing in moderation, the foot is either slamming on the brakes or floored on the accelerator, with all the Cape Town robots (traffic lights) it is no laughing matter.

Just as I think the day can't get any worse, we head to MAKRO, an oversized electrical store selling everything imaginable, preparation for Kids in Parks we need a proforma invoice and a quotation, but getting one member of staff that knows what they are talking about is another matter, then you have to go to each department separately, you turn around and where the hell is Aldo?? Arrggghhhh!

Mission finally completed after a few hours, I kid you not, it is back on the road to pick up Jack, who passed his exam with flying colours and commence the journey back home to Swellendam. The three hours is filled getting to know Jack and his culture a little better, as he tells me and Aldo about his family and the traditions.

One being that you must pay your in laws, when choosing a Wife. Latterly you have been able to pay in cold hard cash, but previously your Wifes hand in marriage was set by the number of cattle and sheep you could provide. Originally I thought the whole idea a little odd, lets face it girls, its hard enough these days finding a good man, let alone one that will marry you, and to pay for the privilege as well! But wait maybe they are on to something here, the man is surely showing he is the provider, hard as it seem, he is prepared to make the investment in you, putting his money where his mouth is, so to speak, so therefore does this show a greater commitment to being with the one he loves? Maybe? It's just a thought, serious though, what the hell do I know, men are from another planet :)

European Reunion

Tuesday 12 May 2009 - With sandwiches packed lovingly made by yours truly, the Rangers and People & Conservation Department go their separate ways today, each heading to different corners of Table Mountain National Park. Aldo and I have a slow start, still unsure whether anyone is available to see us from TMNP P&C.

Finally we get a lift to Westlake in Cape Town to meet Calvin Mojapelo TMNP P&C Manager, this giving us the ideal opportunity to pick his brains regarding the running of a large scale P&C department, during which we are introduced to Mark Hawthorne, one of TMNP three P&C Officers.

Meeting complete, Mark takes the occasion to show us a little of the Park, with Aldo up front and me in the back of the covered bakkie with three other international volunteers, two French and one German.

And so my first ascent up Table Mountain commences, travelling to The People's Trail Hut on a near vertical dirt track wide enough for one vehicle, a sheer drop at one side. OMG one false move at the wheel and we are goners!!! Sat on the metal floor of the bakkie, is not the most comfortable of experiences especially when travelling on bumps, I am therefore not best pleased when Aldo suggests a trip up Table Mountain cable car to Mark, with time pressing this means we have to travel down the mountain side in double time, oh dear my poor coccyx!

Avoiding certain death, we make it back to level ground, the luxury of tarmac and the slow grind of Cape Town rush hour. Despite the odds, we make it to the cable car in good time, only to find that it has broken down, the visitors that had made the trip earlier would be waiting around three hours to make their slow descent. Although a little disappointed, I know I will return to Cape Town some other time, a visit to South Africa surely cannot be complete without a trip up Table Mountains cable car, can it?

With the setting sun glistening in the ocean, we journey back making a slight detour to check out the facilities at the Sunbird Education Centre.

Arriving back at base just after 19h30, I find the Rangers have made a start on dinner, this is said with a hint of sarcasm! Their sole contribution for the three days being building a fire for the braai. Me man, me make fire ugh! Maybe I am doing them an injustice, for they did do the washing up and Elton cooked the meat, Jedi braaier that he is, whilst I thrashed Jack at a game pool! Sshhh don't tell anyone, lets preserve Jacks ego, not bad for a gal who hasn't played for over a decade, eh?!?

Pick up a Penguin!

Monday 11 May 2009 - Behind the wheel of the canopy bakkie, I drive Aldo (People & Conservation Officer) and Lungile aka Jack (Field Ranger) to Cape Town for staff exchange with Table Mountain National Park. Collecting another Bontebok staff member - Elton (Section Ranger) in Mandalay, a suburb of CT, we finally locate him despite dismal directions.

All aboard, we travel along the coastal road around False Bay and through Simonstown, towards the Cape of Good Hope, and our home for the next couple of days, Duiker Cottage situated within the National Park.

Due to some confusion within the TMNP P&C team, we are unable to meet with them today, so after unloading our gear and food provisions, we make use of the time and see what the Park has to offer.

Firstly visiting the penguins at Boulders Beach in Simonstown. Despite being warned on numerous occasions that the colony of birds is quite smelly, I was not deterred and pleasantly surprised finding them far from pungent. Wanting to visit Boulders Beach since the days of Judith Charmers and Wish you were here, I sat on the rocks and watched the penguins waddling around me, jumping in and out of the sea swells, or sleeping on land, many in dug out nests protecting their clutch of eggs.

Sadly leaving my monochrome friends, we head to one of the windiest places on the Planet, Cape Point. Braving strong gusts of wind whilst climbing the steps leading to the lighthouse. The view was simply breathtaking overlooking the rugged Cape Point and the Cape of Good Hope, jagged cliff face plunging into the blue depths of the Atlantic Ocean.

Sexy SANParks uniform or what!?! Yes, OK, OK - WHAT!

Childs play!

Till Sunday 10 May 2009 - Saturday requires a mammoth shop at SPAR ready for Mondays trip to Table Mountain National Park. The only problem is the banks in town are not playing nicely or should I say, not paying nicely, trying to withdraw cash from three different banks to no avail, surely I can't be insolvent already!?! Luckily Aldo is in town and able to give me a sub. With shopping list in hand, I cruise the aisles and complete the biggest shop since arriving in SA.

Sunday and I am back on the motorbike. With an inclement start to the day, mist rolling in from the mountains, I fully appreciate the delights of biking back in the UK, with condensation furring up my visor I barely see the rural landscape, a patchwork of cropped farmland and the isolated traditional homes as we meander off road through cold and damp to Montagu. Arriving at the restaurant come farm shop and nursery on Route 62, the sun is thankfully breaking through. After a hearty breakfast overlooking the drying riverbed, the child in me squeezes my derriere into a swing inventively made out of an old tyre, unfortunately not designed for use by full grown adults it lacked the apparent legroom needed to gain any momentum. Shame!

Back at Marloth, Bens' dog Sky discovers a puff adder in his domain, the reptile must have recently shed its skin, its beautiful colouring shimmering in the sun as it slithered a hasty retreat into the under growth, obviously perturbed about the production of one hooked stick and black plastic box.

The day was completed with a walk on the mountain, through pine tree plantation, reminiscent of times spent in Yorkshires Dalby Forest, but on a grander scale. The foliage slowly changing, the forest floor covered in dense mountainous fynbos, the ferns with fronds of new growth awaiting to uncurl. The dam nearby mirroring the mountain peaks in the slight ripple of its cool waters.

It's a small World..........

Till Friday 8 May 2009 - National Bird Week - with plans to erect two owl boxes in Suurbraak and encourage these predators to nest, the P&C department concentrate on a lesson plan to teach the local children the benefits of having owls inhabiting the area. With many old myths and superstitions surrounding these nocturnal birds, the owl being associated with death and bad luck in SA, it is important to reeducate these young minds.

Visiting three schools during the course of the week, I nervously give the owl lesson in Engels (English!) with a klein bietjie (tiny) amount of Afrikaans, asking questions throughout the lesson, I am met with glazed expressions from a room full of faces. Can they understand me? Finishing with a test on the subject matter, many of the kids receive top marks, I conclude that they can understand me perfectly well, they are just a little shy to answer in English. Completing the lesson for four classes in total, I educate 254 children over the week, the largest group being 110 children with the added pressure of Swellendam TV filming the proceeds, yet I still manage to get a couple of laughs out of the audience!

Asanda thankfully has the sense to speak to Bulelwa on Monday, and confess about the damage to the bakkie.

Thinking forward for our World Environment Week recycling project, Aldo and I visit Magpie in Barrydale on Wednesday. This art studio concentrates on lighting and recycling http://www.magpiehomefineware.mfbiz.com/ the firm produces the most amazing chandeliers and light fittings made from recyclables and is heavily involved within the community of Barrydale providing employment, obvious recycling facilities and HIV awareness, together with annually providing and decorating the village Christmas tree. On our return to Bontebok, we pop in to Jam Tart Cafe for tea and cake, the owner of which, recognising my accent, informs me she lived in Yorkshire (Leeds and South Milford!) for 15 years.

Friday brings ten more children to the Park for Plant Monitoring with Flora (see photo). Ben takes me for pizza and the most amazing chocolate pudding at the local deli coincidentally called 'Woodpecker'.

Do you wanna be in my gang?

Sunday 3 May - Those that knew me before I journeyed to the southern hemisphere would probably describe me as Miss Play it Safe.

They would be surprised, as I surprised myself, for today I donned on leathers, and jumped on not one, but two motorbikes. Well anything for pancakes!

After losing a good friend many years ago in a biking accident, I swore blind you’d never get me on one of those 'things', but maybe South Africa has unearthed the daredevil in me and as they say ‘never say never!’

Saying that I woke feeling far from daredevil like and actually praying for precipitation, the only way to postpone the day without losing face! The weather being inclement recently, it wasn’t a huge ask, but oh no, beautiful blue skies and the sun shining. A good a day to die as any, I suppose!

I heard the bike before I saw it, a huge hunk of metal. Against my better judgment, I leathered up and with crash helmet firmly in place, straddle the roaring machine, clinging on for dear life. What on earth was I thinking!

Travelling to Marloth to change from off roader to road bike, eyes firmly shut I see little of the landscape whizzing past. First leg of the journey over, dismounting, I find I am shaking, quite literally, my pins turning to jelly. Words of reassurement such as ‘You cannot fall off’ prove to be little comfort, particularly as the sentence is barely complete, and the bike crashes to the ground whilst maneuvering it back into the garage.

Not any less scary on the road bike, but I venture to keep my eyes open. Heading down the N2, I focus on the landscape, the open fields, the occasion herd of goats, some on hind legs munching the tree foliage, all shadowed by the magnificent Langeberg. Leaving the main road, we wind through Suurbraak, avoiding nomadic cattle and children playing in the street, then on the pass towards Barrydale, we meander through the dramatic scenery, lush green mountains cascading down into water filled ravines, all the while the sunshine causing pretty spectrums in my visor.

Arriving at our destination, The Country Pumpkin in Barrydale for breakfast, I cannot help myself. OK, I’ve admitted it already - I swore I’d never get on a motorbike, but that hasn’t stopped me harboring a secret fantasy of one day becoming a wanton biker chick, all legs and leather, casually removing my crash helmet, and shaking free waves of shimmering blonde locks which flow full of life momentary in the breeze, before tumbling down my back in Hollywood slow motion. Sadly such is life, reality barely touches the fantasy, gingerly removing the helmet without the loss of an ear, my golden mane lays lifeless, firmly stuck to my head, with the fullness and body equaling that of Mahatma Gandhi.

Thankfully the breakfast, started with a shot of some alcoholic complimentary for bikers, was worth all the drama and it is time to travel back, or so I think.

Heading the wrong direction for home, we ride into the arid landscape of the Little Karoo, in search of renowned biker haunt known as Ronnie’s Sex Shop. Situated midway between Barrydale and Ladismith, this place started life as Ronnie’s Shop, selling a few oddments to passing travellers, but after a raucous all nighter, some bright spark drunkenly took a ladder, paintbrush and red paint and made a small, but substantial addition to the signage. And who would have thought it, sex sells, even in the desert. Ronnie, the ZZ top look-alikey now owns one thriving business with Road Kill Café, small shop selling T-shirts and one infamous bar, where you can pin your business card to the wall and leave your bra hanging from the ceiling. The toilets are equally entertaining walls covered with graffiti from all corners of the globe. Not wanting to let the side down, I felt compelled to make my own addition.

Returning to the safety of Bontebok, much to my Mothers relief, no doubt, I know I will never be a biker chick, yet I have gained a valuable insight into the two wheeled feet of engineering, and can now understand the attraction held avidly by others.

For Jody, always remembered for your love and your laughter. You are missed, dear friend.

Between a rock and a hard place.

Saturday 2 May 2009 - The damage caused in the 'bakkie incident', unfortunately was not just a little scrape, a full panel behind the drivers door was concaved with scratches so deep the paint was literally chipping off from the metal. Will no one coming forward with a confession, Bulelwa has no alternative to have her Inspector Clouseau hat on. Stood in reception Bulelwa starts to tell me the whole debacle, as I guiltily turn an unequivocal shade far deeper than that of the Pink Panther.

This is so difficult and to make matters worse I am spending the day with my friend Bulelwa, I can't tell her, this needs to come from Asanda. Much to my relief, the subject is changed and bizarrely turns all magical, since we are on our way to discover that fairies do exist, or at least they do in Swellendam.

Entering the mystical garden through a gated hole in shrubbery, we were welcomed into the Faerie Sanctuary and asked to turn cellphones off and not to take photographs, I assume so not to disturb the delicate inhabitants! I could see the magic of this place through the eyes of the children, but there was no lustre of fairy dust for me.